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1999 Core Concepts
of Transactional Analysis (English Version)
TRANSACTIONAL ANALYSIS IS:
- an easily understandable yet sophisticated
psychological theory about people's thinking, feelings and behavior and,
- a contemporary and effective system of
psychotherapy, education, organizational and socio-cultural analysis and social
psychiatry.
EGO STATES AND TRANSACTIONS. People's
interactions are made up of transactions. Any one transactions has
two parts: the stimulus and the response. Individual transactions are
usually part of a larger set. Some of these transactional sets or sequences can
be direct, productive and healthy or they can be devious, wasteful and
unhealthy.
When people interact they do so in one of three
different ego states. An ego state is a specific way of thinking feeling
and behaving and each ego state has its origin in specific regions of the
brain. People can behave from their Parent ego state, or from their
Child ego state or from their Adult ego state. At any one time
our actions come from one of these three ego states.
THE CHILD. When we are in the Child ego state
we act like the child we once were. We aren't just putting on an act; we think,
feel, see, hear and react as a three or five or eight year old child. The ego
states are fully experienced states of being, not just roles. When the Child is
hateful or loving, impulsive, spontaneous or playful it is called the
Natural Child. When it is thoughtful, creative or imaginative it is
called the Little Professor. When it is fearful, guilty or ashamed it is
called the Adapted Child. The Child has all the feelings; fear, love, anger,
joy, sadness, shame and so on. The Child is often blamed for being the source
of people's troubles because it is self-centered, emotional, powerful and
resists the suppression that comes with growing up.
In transactional analysis (TA) the Child is seen as
the source of creativity, recreation and procreation; the only source of
renewal in life. The Child can be observed in children for extended periods of
time, but also in grownups in situations where people have permission to let
the Child out, like at sport events or parties. The Child will appear for short
periods of time in other situations, such as board meetings, classrooms or
serious discussions where it may not be desired at all. In its most undesirable
form it completely dominates a person's life, as in the cases of persons who
are severely emotionally disturbed whose confused, depressed, crazy or addicted
Child will drive them to virtual self-destruction with out-of-control behavior.
The Child may also appear for long periods of time in the form of depression or
grief, as in the case of people who have incurred a great loss.
THE PARENT. The Parent is like a tape recorder.
It is a collection of pre-recorded, pre-judged, prejudiced codes for living.
When a person is in the Parent ego state she thinks, feels and behaves like one
of her parents or someone who took their place. The Parent decides, without
reasoning, how to react to situations, what is good or bad, and how people
should live. The Parent judges for or against and can be controlling or
supportive. When the Parent is critical it is called the Critical
Parent. When it is supportive it is called the Nurturing Parent.
One ego state can dominate a person to the
exclusion of the other two. An example of this is the excluding
Nurturing or Critical Parent, which happens when a person is unable to use
their Child or Adult. This person is at a great disadvantage because in order
to be a well-functioning human being, the ego states must be available when
needed.
With an excluding Parent as the only functioning ego
state a person has to live without the benefit of his Child or Adult and is
therefore cut off from two thirds of his human potential.
The Parent uses old "tapes" to solve problems, and is
therefore usually twenty five years behind the times (though it may be 250 or
as much as 2,500 years behind the times.) and is useful when there is no
information available to the Adult, or no time to use the Adult to think. The
Child, on the other hand, will create novel solutions based on intuition but
these solutions may not be as reliable as the fact-based Adult decisions.
THE ADULT. When in the Adult ego state the
person functions as a human computer. It operates on data it collects and
stores or uses to make decisions according to a logic-based program.
When in the Adult ego state the person uses logical
thinking to solve problems making sure that Child or Parent emotions do not
contaminate the process. People may conclude from this that emotions are not
good. But it only means that in order to be rational and logical we need to be
able to separate ourselves from our emotions. It doesn't mean that to be
rational and logical is the best way to be at all times. In fact, just as an
excluding Parent makes for an incomplete human being, so does an excluding
Adult have the same deadening effect on people. People will also object: "I am
an adult and I have emotions!" and they are right. Being a mature human being
or grownup is not the same as being in the Adult ego state. Little children can
be in their Adult and well adjusted grown-ups use their Parent and Child all
the time.
The Adult computes all the facts fed into it. If the
facts are up-to-date, then the Adult's answers will be timely and more
effective than the Parent's solution. If the facts are incorrect, the Adult
computer will produce incorrect answers. A very important function of the Adult
is to predict outcomes and to provide a fact-based critique of the
effectiveness of people's behavior in the pursuit of their chosen goals. This
fact-based, critical function is different from the value-based function of the
Critical Parent.
Sometimes the Adult uses information which has its
source in the Child or in the Parent and which may be incorrect. This is known
as contamination. When a contamination comes from the Parent it is
called a prejudice. For instance when someone assumes that women prefer to
follow a man's lead instead of making their own decisions this is data which
comes to the Adult the from the Parent, and is a contamination because it is
accepted as a fact without checking it against reality.
The same unchecked acceptance of information can occur
with information fed by the Child in which case it is called delusion. A
delusion is usually based on a Child fear or hope that is accepted as reality
by the Adult. For instance when a person is convinced that he is being poisoned
by the government this is probably based on his Child's fears which the Adult
accepts, rather than on fact. An extremely important process in transactional
analysis is decontamination of the Adult.
VOICES IN THE HEAD. As you will recall, the
Parent ego state is like a tape recorder full of pre- judged, prejudiced, pre-
programmed statements. These "taped" statements can get activated while we are
in our Adult or Child and then we can actually hear them as "voices in our
heads." The Parental tapes can feel good or bad depending on which Parent
makes them. In other personality theories, the harmful Critical Parent voices
are known as the harsh super-ego, negative self-talk, cognitive traps, low
self-esteem, punitive protector or catastrophic expectations.
The Critical Parent can makes put-down statements
like: "You're bad, stupid, ugly, crazy and sick; in short you're doomed, not
OK." The Nurturing Parent loves the Child unconditionally and says things like:
"I love you," "You're a winner," "You're smart," "You're a princess" or "You're
beautiful."
The Critical Parent sometimes controls the Child by
preventing it from feeling good about itself. If the Child wants to be loved
the Critical Parent says, "You don't deserve it." If the Child wants to give
love the Critical Parent may say, "It isn't wanted." If the Child is angry at
an unrewarding job, the Critical Parent may say, "This is the best you can do
because you are lazy." If the Child comes up with a new idea that goes against
old points of view, the Critical Parent may respond: "You must be crazy to
think like that." The Critical Parent can make people feel not OK and force
them to do things they don't want to do. To counteract this kind of a Critical
Parent people can learn to develop their Nurturing Parent, Adult or Natural
Child.
By means of an egogram we can show the relative
strength of a person's ego states at any one time. This is very useful in
diagramming the way people change over time, especially how they reduce their
Critical Parent and increase their Nurturing Parent Adult or Child.
TRANSACTIONS; COMPLEMENTARY, CROSSED AND
COVERT. Transactions occur when any person relates to any other person.
Each transaction is made up a stimulus and a response and transactions can
proceed from the Parent, Adult or Child of one person to the Parent, Adult or
Child of another person.
Complimentary and Crossed
Transactions. A complimentary transaction involves one ego state in each
person. In a crossed transaction the transactional response is addressed to an
ego state different from the one which started the stimulus.
Communication can continue between two people as long
as transactions are complimentary: Crossed transactions are important because
they disrupt communication. This is useful to know because it helps
transactional analysts understand how and why communication is disrupted. The
rule is: "whenever a disruption of communication occurs, a crossed transaction
caused it." One very important kind of crossed transaction is the
discount transaction. Here a person, in his response, completely
disregards the contents of a transactional stimulus. Discounts are not always
obvious but are always disruptive to the person receiving them and if repeated
can severely disturb the recipient.
Covert
Transactions. Covert transactions occur when people say one thing and mean
another. Covert transactions are the basis of games and are especially
interesting because they are deceptive. They have a social (overt) and a
psychological (covert) level.
It is important to know the difference between the
social and covert levels because in order to understand and predict what people
are going to do, the covert level will give provide more information than the
overt level.
One important reason we say one thing and mean another
is that we are generally ashamed of our Child's or Parent's desires and
feelings. Nevertheless, we act on these desires and express those feelings
while we pretend to be doing otherwise. For instance, we may use smiling
sarcasm instead of a direct expression of our anger, or when scared we may
counter-attack instead of admitting our fears.
When we want attention or love we often feign
indifference, and we have trouble giving or accepting them. In fact, because
our lives are so immersed in half-truth and deception it can happen that we no
longer know what it is our Child really wants. We also don't expect people to
be completely honest so that we never really know whether we can trust what
they say. Transactional analysts encourage people to be honest with one
another, and with themselves, about their wants and feelings, rather than
"crooked" and covert. In this manner people can find out what they want, how to
ask for it and, if possible, how to get it.
STROKES. Stroking is the recognition
that one person gives to another. Strokes are essential to a person's
life. Without them, Berne said, the "spinal cord will shrivel up." It has been
shown that a very young child needs actual physical strokes in order to remain
alive. Adults can get by on fewer physical strokes as they learn to exchange
verbal strokes; positive strokes like praise or expressions of appreciation, or
negative strokes like negative judgements or put downs. Therefore, the exchange
of strokes is one of the most important thing that people do in their daily
lives.
GAMES. The essential aspect of games is that
they are crooked or covert exchanges of strokes. A game is a recurring series
of covert transactions with a beginning, middle and end, and a payoff.
The payoff is a hidden advantage which motivates the players to
participate.
Transactional Analysis became a nation-wide fad in the
1960's due to the best selling success of Eric Berne's book,
Games People Play. In this book he
assigned engaging names (Now Ive got you, Kick
me, I only trying to help.) for different games. For instance
when Jane plays "Why Don' You, Yes But" she asks advice from another but
rejects every suggestion so that everyone ends up exasperated. It is the type
of conversation which occurs over and over again, especially in therapy groups.
It is devious and covert: on the social level, it appears to be a conversation
between a person in the Adult ego state asking a question from one or more
people who are also in their Adult ego states. What makes it a game is that
none of the suggestions are really accepted. The reason for that is that, at
the psychological and much more meaningful level, what is really going on is
that Jane may need advise but needs strokes even more. Because these strokes
are being given in a roundabout way they are not as satisfying as direct
strokes would be. This is why the game ends on a note of depressed
frustration.
PAYOFFS. There are a number of payoffs of this
game; every game pays off at three different levels: 1. The biological
pay-off of a game is strokes. Even though games end badly, all the players
get a considerable number of strokes-both positive and negative-out of playing
them. 2. The social pay-off of a game is time-structuring. People
are able to filled time which otherwise might have been dull and depressing
with an exciting activity. 3. The existential pay-off of a game is the
way in which the game confirms the existential position of each player.
THE EXISTENTIAL POSITION. In the process of
developing an identity people define for themselves, early in life, what the
meaning of their life or existence is. Some people decide they are OK and are
going to have a good life; but many others decide they are not OK and will fail
in some way. That expectation based on a decision of how life will be is their existential position. People
can feel OK or not OK about themselves and others so that there are four main
existential positions: I'm OK, you're OK, I'm OK
you're not OK, I'm not OK you're OK and finally, I'm
not OK you're not OK.
For instance in the game of Why Dont You;
Yes But Janes existential position is that nothing ever works
out so that every time the game is played it reinforces that position and
justifies further depression.
Games are always played with responsibility and
interest by everyone involved in them. In order to maintain her existential
position Jane will find people who will play the game with her. All the
players parts in the game are equally important and they all derive a
pay-off from it as well. When they participate in the game they too believe it
will end in failure. They want strokes as well but are not surprised when Jane
rejects all advice and everyone is depressed or angry as a consequence proving
that you cant really help people or that people dont want to be
helped and justifying their bad feelings as a consequence.
THE STROKE ECONOMY. One of the harmful aspects
of the Critical Parent is that it has a set of rules that govern the giving and
taking of strokes (Don't give, ask for, accept or give yourself strokes) The
effect of these rules, called the stroke economy, is that people are prevented from freely stroking
each other and taking care of their stroke needs. As a consequence, most human
beings live in a state of stroke hunger in which they survive on a deficient
diet of strokes -- in a manner similar to persons who are starved for food --
and spend a great deal of time and effort in trying to satisfy their hunger.
Positive strokes, sometimes called "warm fuzzies," such as
holding hands or saying "I love you," give the person receiving them a feeling
of being OK. There are also negative strokes, which are painful forms of
recognition such as sarcasm, putdowns, a slap, an insult or saying "I hate
you." Negative strokes make the person receiving them feel not OK. Still, even
though unpleasant, negative strokes are a form of recognition and prevent "the
spinal cord from shriveling up." For this reason, people prefer a situation of
negative strokes to a situation without strokes at all. This explains why some
people seem to intentionally hurt themselves in their relationships with
others. It is not because "they enjoy hurting themselves" but because they
can't get positive recognition, and choose painful negative strokes to having
no strokes.
People can learn to exchange strokes freely, open the
hearts and give and ask for strokes without shame or embarrassment. Different
strokes appeal to different people and everyone has their special, secret
wishes. There are many kinds of positive strokes - there are physical strokes
and verbal strokes. Physical strokes can be hugs, kisses, holding, caresses,
strong or light, sexy, sensual or just friendly, nurturing or slightly teasing
and so on. Verbal strokes can be about a people's looks - their face, body,
posture or movements or about a person's personality - their intelligence,
loving nature sensitivity or courage. In any case, people need and deserve
strokes and if they ask for them they will usually find someone who has just
the strokes they want and is willing to give them.
RITUALS, PASTIMES, GAMES, INTIMACY, WORK. There
are five ways people can structure their time to get strokes: 1. A
ritual is a pre-set exchange of recognition strokes. 2. A
pastime is a pre-set conversation around a certain subject.
Pastimes are most evident at cocktail parties and family get-togethers. Some
common pastimes are: Weather (Hot enough for you?) PTA (pot luck or catered?),
Sports (How bout them Yankees?) Drugs (Should Marijuana Be Legalized?),
or Who's Divorcing Who? (Musical Beds). 3.
Games are repetitive, devious series
of transactions intended to get strokes. Unfortunately, the strokes obtained in
games are mostly negative. A game is a failed method of getting wanted strokes.
4. Intimacy is a direct and powerful exchange of strokes which people
crave but seldom attain because the Child is frightened away from it by hurtful
experiences. Intimacy is not the same as sex, although it often occurs in sex.
Sex, however, can also be a ritual, a pastime, a game, or work. 5. Work
is an activity which has a product as its result. Good work results in the
exchange of strokes as a side effect.
Intimacy and work are the most satisfying ways of
obtaining strokes. Unfortunately, lasting intimacy is difficult to achieve
because people are often emotionally illiterate and work is often unsatisfying
when people work in isolation and dont get praise for their
accomplishments. Therefore, people must resort to rituals, games, and pastimes
which are safer, though far less satisfying ways of obtaining strokes. For
example, a marriage can be an endless and boring series of rituals, pastimes
and games. Frequently this is because both partners live on the basis of
stroke-depriving life scripts which prevent men from being emotional and
intimate and women from being able to use their Adult to ask for and get the
love they want.
DEGREES. Games can be played in a range of
degrees. For instance, the above example of the game YDYB is the softest
(first degree) version of the game because it is relatively harmless. The hard
(third degree) version of this game might be played by an alcoholic who "yes,
buts" every suggestion of the Rescuer to his dying moment. Third degree games
involve tissue damage.
ROLES. Different people play different
roles in the games they play. When a person is are willing to play one
of the roles of a game he will often find himself playing the other roles in
the game. There are a variety of roles but the three basic game roles are
Persecutor, Rescuer, and
Victim. Whole families marriages, work places, schools and friendships
are often based on these roles. The three roles can be arranged in a triangle
to illustrate what happens:
THE DRAMA TRIANGLE. The drama triangle
can be illustrated with the Addiction Game. In the Addiction Game, the addict
playing the role of the Victim of addiction, humiliation, prejudice, medical
neglect and even police brutality seeks and finds a Rescuer. The Rescuer plays
the role by trying to generously and selflessly help the addict without making
sure that the addict is invested in the process of giving up drug abuse. After
a certain amount of frustrating failure the Rescuer gets angry and
switches into the Persecuting role by accusing, insulting, neglecting or
punishing the addict. At this point the addict switches from Victim to
Persecutor by counterattacking, insulting, becoming violent and creating
midnight emergencies. The erstwhile Rescuer is now the Victim in the game. This
process of switching goes on endlessly around the Drama Triangle
Merry-go-Round.
To avoid the drama triangle in psychotherapy,
transactional analysts insist on establishing a contract in which the
person specifically states what he/she wants to be cured of. This protects both
client and therapist: the therapist knows exactly what the person wants, and
the person knows what the therapist is going to work on and when therapy is to
be completed. In any case, the best way to avoid the Drama Triangle is to avoid
the roles of Rescuer, Persecutor or Victim by staying in the Adult ego
state.
SCRIPTS. Transactional analysts believe that
most people are basically OK and in difficulty only because their parents (or
other grownups and influential young people) have exposed them to powerful
injunctions and attributions with long-term harmful effects.
People, early in their lives come to the conclusion
that their lives will unfold in a predictable way; short, long, healthy,
unhealthy, happy, unhappy depressed or angry, successful or failed, active or
passive. When the conclusion is that life will be bad or self damaging this is
seen as a life script.
The script
matrix is a diagram used to clarify people's scripts. In it we see two
parents and their offspring and we can diagram the transactional messages--injunctions and attributions--which
caused the young person to abandon their original OK position and replace it
with a serf-damaging not OK position.
When life is guided by a script there are always
periods in which the person appears to be evading his or her unhappy fate. This
seemingly normal period of the script, is called the
counterscript. The counterscript is active when the person's
unhappy life plan gives way to a happier period. This is, however, only
temporary and invariably collapses, giving way to the original scripting. For
an alcoholic, this may be a period of sobriety; for a depressed person with a
suicide script it may be a brief period of happiness which inevitably ends when
the script's injunctions take over.
In the Script Matrix of Joseph, a drug addict we see
that the script injunction "Don't think, drink instead." goes to Joseph's Child
from his father's Child. This powerful message influences Joseph's life
dramatically, when he follows his fathers injunction with drugs instead
of alcohol causing him repeated drug abuse episodes through his young life and
adulthood. The counterscript message "You should not drink to excess,"
motivates him to make repeated but ineffectual efforts to cut down on drug
abuse and it goes to Joseph's Parent from his mother and father's Parent.
The Script message: "don't think, drink instead"
delivered from Child-to-Child-is more influential than the Parent-to-Parent
counterscript message to abuse moderately: that is why the script messages will
usually prevail unless the person changes his or her script. When scripts are
not changed they are passed down the generations, like hot
potatoes, from grownups to children in an uninterrupted chain of
maladaptive, toxic behavior patterns.
DECISIONS. In a healthy home environment
parents will give unconditional protection to their children regardless of what
they may do. When parents make their protection conditional on children's
submission to their injunctions and attributions, the children are likely to
develop a script. Script decisions are often consciously made in order to go
along with parental injunctions, even though they go against the child's best
self-interests. At this point the young person trades autonomy for parental
protection to avoid punishment and criticism. The decision involved is a switch
from an "I'm OK" position to an Im not OK" position. It also often
involves a decision about whether other people are OK. When people make such
decisions, they may need the help of a therapist to discard the script and
begin to pursue an autonomous life course or as Berne put it: "Close down the
show and put a new on the road".
As individuals are helped to go back to the early
experiences which caused them to make decisions that were necessary for their
physical or psychological survival then, but are getting in their way in the
present, they can make redecisions to behave differently in order to
have a more fulfilling life in the present.
It is possible to observe a person's script in brief
sequences of behavior called miniscripts which constantly mimic and
reinforce the script. The fact is that everything that goes on in people's
mental and emotional life is reflected in their behavior. That is how by
studying people's transactions, transactional analysts are able to understand
the ways and reasons of people's behavior and help them stop playing games,
change their scripts and get the most out of life.
TRAGIC AND BANAL SCRIPTS. Some scripts are
tragic and some scripts are banal. Tragic scripts are highly
dramatic such as drug addiction, suicide or "mental illness." Banal, or
garden-variety scripts are less dramatic but more common. They are the
melodramas of everyday life. They usually affect large sub-groups of people
such as men, women, racial groups or teenagers. People in these sub-groups are
scripted to live their lives in certain set ways: in the past women were
supposed to be emotional loving home-makers, and have no permission to be
logical, strong or independent; men to be logical, strong, bread-winners, with
no permission to be childlike, scared, needy nurturing or openly loving. A
banal script's life course may be: going from bad to worse, never having fun,
always being in debt or taking care of others and neglecting oneself..
Members of certain nationalities or races are supposed
to be smart or stupid or honest or devious or good athletes or reckless or cold
and so on. Some cultures, script their children to be competitive so that they
have trouble cooperating and living with each other. Other cultures emphasize
cooperation and cause people who are strong individuals to feel thy are no OK.
These cultural scripts can affect whole populations in a harmful way.
RACKETS. One aspect of scripts is the
existential payoff of games is the bad feelings which are accumulated and can
eventually blow up and lead to an emotional disaster. Each game's existential
payoff accumulates to eventually cause a predicted script outcome. Some people
collect angry feelings that they will eventually justify a divorce. Others
accumulate depressive feelings toward a suicide. The fact that they are
creating situations which produce the negative feelings of their script choice
is called their emotional racket.
PERMISSION, PROTECTION and POTENCY.
Permission is a very important part of a transactional analysis. It's a
situation in which the educator or therapist says, "You can do what your
parents or other people told was wrong" or "You don't have to keep doing what
you decided to do as a child." For example, if a person who is now very shy was
told "Don't ask for anything," one permission would be to ask for what is
wanted or needed. "Ask for strokes, you deserve them." When a person takes a
permission and goes against parental and social demands and wishes, their Child
is apt to get very frightened. That is why protection is a very
important part of change. Protection is given or offered by the teacher or
therapist, preferably with a group's support, to a person who is ready to
change his or her script. The therapist and the group offer protection to the
person when they say, "Don't worry, everything's going to be all right. We'll
back you up and take care of you when you're scared." Permission and protection
increase the therapeutic potency of a transactional analysts by
introducing the Nurturing Parent into the situation. Use of the therapist's
Parent and Child (as when having fun during therapy) makes the transactional
analyst more effective than the professional who uses only one-third of his
personality and relates to clients only with his or her Adult.
CONTRACTS. TA therapists work contractually,
that is the make agreements about what specific outcome the client desires.
Typical contracts are getting over
depression or getting rid of my headaches, or stop
abusing alcohol, or earning a decent living, or getting
good grades. While a lot can go on in psychotherapy, the long term
therapeutic contract is "always on top" as the guiding goal of a transactional
analyst. In addition, transactional analysts will make short term contracts for
homework, or for sobriety of for "no suicide" to help clients achieve their
overall contractual goal.
Since people are born OK it stands to reason that with
competent help they can return to their original OK position. The capacity to
be OK is waiting in every person ready to be released from the prohibitions of
the script. Transactional analysts know that by making clear, goal oriented
therapeutic contracts, effectively analyzing people's transactions and
powerfully giving people permission to change and protecting them from their
fears, it is possible for everyone to have a chance to become happy, loving and
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